SLP & AUD Jokes/Humor

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» This is an /s/ articulation joke
How do you top a car??? Tep on the brake tupid. "How do you stop a car? Step on the break stupid" ...
Added on : 20-Apr-2007	Added by : Betty	Viewed : 1059 times
» Concrete
There once was a construction contractor that really loved kids. One day he decided to make a concrete sidewalk for them. After he worked all day pooring the concrete he thought about how his work would help children. He returned the next day and found ...
Added on : 13-Mar-2007	Added by : SLP/AUD Jokes Staff	Viewed : 1327 times
» Dead Duck
My Duck is Dead * A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm ...
Added on : 02-Oct-2006	Added by : Bill	Viewed : 1660 times
» Brain Transplant
A man was in a horrible car accident and was brought to the ER. The doctor came out to speak with the man's family about his injuries. The doctor explained that the man's head injury was so horrific that only a brain transplant could help him. However, ...
Added on : 31-May-2006	Added by : anonymous	Viewed : 1930 times
» Holy Water
What do you get when you mix holy water and castor oil? A religious movement! ...
Added on : 31-May-2006	Added by : anonymous	Viewed : 1634 times
» What's Wrong?
This exercise focuses on intensive reading. Read one sentence at a time and find the inappropriate vocabulary mistake or contradiction. All errors are in the choice of vocabulary NOT in grammar. Jack Forest is a baker who always provides his customers ...
Added on : 06-Dec-2005	Added by : Edwin	Viewed : 2262 times
» Didot
Make logical guesses about the meaning of the unknown words in the following paragraph. Jack quickly entered the didot and cleaned the various misturaes he had been using to repair the wuipit. He had often thought that this job was extremely yullning. ...
Added on : 06-Dec-2005	Added by : Linsey	Viewed : 2415 times
» Dr. Smith
I was talking to a friend about their new career in Speech Pathology. I asked "So do your patients call you Dr. Smith?" reply "no-no. They just call me Chris. If they can." ...
Added on : 08-Nov-2005	Added by : Smith	Viewed : 2518 times
» Chair
An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the ...
Added on : 21-Mar-2005	Added by : Tina	Viewed : 3452 times
» Buttons
A teacher asks her class if anyone can use the word fascinate in a sentence. Brian raises his hand and says, "The sky is fascinating." The teacher says, "No that's fascinating." Jennifer raises her hand and says, "When I saw the tigers a ...
Added on : 21-Mar-2005	Added by : Tina	Viewed : 2118 times

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Joke of the moment

A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma'am, we haven't had any for some weeks now, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting any soon."

Alarmed, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "T...

Statistics

Number of joke posters : 23
Number of jokes : 109
Number of pictures : 26